It is official: you need to stop saying “you guys”

I know I am late to the party on this, but judging by how often I still hear the phrase “you guys”—sometimes from my own mouth—English-speaking North Americans still struggle with this.

Twice in the last few weeks I have had run-ins with “you guys”. First, it was at a presentation by a male presenter to a large mixed audience. He caught himself saying “you guys” and then instead of just apologizing, he said: “When I say ‘you guys’, please know I mean everyone. Is that OK?” More than one female voice shouted back: “NO!”. He was noticeably embarrassed.

Second was at an intimate leadership training event. Each of us had to give impromptu presentations in front of the group and then we were critiqued afterwards by the dean of the program. A woman did a great presentation—one of the best of the 25—and was told so by the 75-year-old white male dean, but in the areas for improvement, he noted her use of “you guys” as inappropriate. “Leaders with character work hard to be neutral with their communications and not alienate or offend…so as to increase the reach of their message,” he said.

80% of women, by one informal poll, are not offended by the use of “you guys”. Makes you think it might be okay? No. The converse is that 20% of women are offended. Some men are offended by the term, too.

All of us leaders, men and women alike, need to move on from “you guys”. But how?

Well, “y’all” is an option, but I know many of us city slickers are not going to find this easy to use.

I found this in the comments section of a blog post on the matter:

Here’s the thing—grammatically, you don’t need the second word in many places where this phrase is used:

Wait-staff taking your order: “What would you like tonight?”
Your friends: “What movie would you like to see?”
A group of people you’re thinking about joining wherever they’re heading: “Which way are you going?”
Two women to whom you’re giving an award: “Congratulations to both of you.”

When I pose a question to an audience these days, I just take out the “guys”. For example: “How many of you have heard of Jim Collins?”

It is not hard to get by without the male reference, but it is hard to grind the habit out of our minds. But the time has come to get it done, y’all.

Enjoyed this week’s blog?
Subscribe to the IBEX Payroll Leadership Blog for great tips and insight right in your inbox! We publish new leadership and employee engagement content every week !!

IBEX Payroll extends our profound respect and immeasurable gratitude to all the ancestors and keepers of the land on whose traditional territories our work takes place. We acknowledge that we are on Treaty 1 territory, the traditional gathering place of the Anishinaabe, Cree, Oji-Cree, Dakota and Dene people and the traditional homeland of the Métis people. This land is sacred, historical, and significant.

Every time we acknowledge this truth, we have an invitation and an opportunity to reflect on the wrongs of the past, what we do in the present, and what we can do to continually honour the people whose lands and water we benefit from today.

This statement only acts as a first step in honouring the land we reside on and its peoples, and must be paired with education, understanding and informed action.